• Rebuilding The Emotional Connection In Your Marriage

    How Can You Repair the Emotional Damage in your Marriage

    Very few things in this world have more reach and negative power than when the emotional connection in your marriage is in disrepair.


    The emotional disconnect takes its toll.

    Emotional Survival of A Cheating Wife

    The Pain Of A Cheating Spouse…Emotional Hurts.

     

    Perhaps you only become aware of its power when a crisis erupts such as an extra-marital affair.


    Other times, the emotional disconnect is like an air conditioner humming in the background. It’s white noise. You usually are not aware of the noise but when your attention is called to it, the noise annoys and demands your energy.


    Emotional disconnect is like living continually with a low grade fever. At times, when you feel most vulnerable, it intensifies in the form of a crisis that threatens the health and perhaps existence of your marriage.


    Addressing and repairing the emotional disconnect allows your marriage to blossom and opens new avenues for intimacy and joy.


    I’m sure you want that.


    I’m recommending you get a copy of Save My Marriage – powerful secrets to rescue your marriageto help you repair the emotional disconnect and create new streams of understanding and closeness.


    Click here to get your copy of Emotional Connection here:


    You will benefit by reading the “6 Step Relationship Life Cycle.”


    You are not typically taught to think in terms of marriage stages or processes.

     

    You will learn how to mentally stand back and see the larger picture of your marriage growth. This “standing back” is often the first step in feeling less stuck and seeing more options for you and your loved one.


    Here are other sections you will find helpful:


    The top 7 Marriage Mistakes to Avoid
    Dealing with Conflict and Anger
    Identifying specific expectations and standards
    How to work as a team
    How to handle money
    What about the workplace?
    The place of children in a marriage


     You will be walked through the 5 Stages of Coping with a Marital Crisis.


    And, an important chapter speaks to Sex and Intimacy.


    Room is given for you to complete exercises alone that help you target and expand on specific issues. And, if both you and your spouse share a commitment to growth,  you both will be provided exercises and checklists for you to work on together.
    Click this link for more information.

    Sincere regards,

    Laurence

    Cheating Spouse Healing


    P.S. I always recommend getting your hands on as many helpful products you can when you commit to change and growth. Each author has something for YOU.


    Again, here’s the link:

  • Can I Ever Trust My Cheating Spouse Again?

     

    Hello Laurence here,

    Whether it was your husband or your wife that “ducked” that is the cheating spouse makes no difference.

    A mutual trust was violated and needs to be addressed before any marriage restoration can take place.

    Dr. Huizenga, in the 9th tape of this 20 tape series on surviving infidelity presents the often asked or implied question, “Will I ever trust again?”

    He approaches this question from two directions.

    This question may mean, “will I ever trust my cheating spouse again?

    cheating wife survival

    A cheating wife will wreak havoc on your emotions and your marriage.

     

    Dr. Huizenga looks at the time frame for rebuilding trust and the ways to rebuild that trust.

    A second component addressed is, Will I ever be able to love again?

    Watch It Here.

    He gives 3 components for rebuilding your capacity to trust your self in entering a healthy marriage..

    Marriage Restoration

    Rebuild Trust In Your Marriage And Begin To Live Free

  • 21 Ideas For Surviving An Extra-Marital Affair

    surviving the infidelity

    Discover 21 Steps To Surviving The Extra-Marital Affair

    Hello,

    I have found an amazing Infidelity Support Group on Facebook, in which members join to both heal themselves and help others heal. It’s truly a remarkable group of people.

    From time to time I stumble upon a post that really resonates with me. This happened the other day, so I asked my group member for permission to share his post as a public blog. As a huge contributor to the group, he has agreed to allow me to share his invaluable advice. I believe visitors to my blog who are dealing with the pain of infidelity will really benefit from his words of wisdom.

    infidelity and marriage

    Regarding Infidelity, others we can only love, we can only change ourselves.

    Following is his insightful post into surviving an extra-marital affair.

    “My wife has had numerous affairs since 2009. It has been absolute hell for myself and my kids. Our marriage won’t survive all of this.

    Here is what I have learned since that time. I wish I could have learned it sooner, but that isn’t how life works:

    1. You can’t make someone love you.

    2. You can’t force someone to do the right thing.

    3. All the ‘hoping’ in the world won’t change another person.

    4. At some point ‘hoping’ will keep you stuck. You must take action.

    5. People will treat you the way you allow them to.

    6. It is normal to fall in and out of love with your spouse.

    7. A good marriage requires you to stay connected to your spouse.

    8. People change over time and so do our hopes and dreams. We need to embrace that rather than fear it.

    9. Secrets kill a marriage.

    10. Foster an environment where you can share without fear of judgement.

    11. You can never trust someone 100%.

    12. Don’t rely on someone to ‘fill you up’ that is your job.

    13. Love is a risk worth taking.

    14. Forgiveness is for you. You will forgive when you’re ready and it can take a long time to happen. I want to urge you to take a look at a book I am reading. “Total Forgiveness” by R.T.Kendall.  Super Work!

    15. Sometimes things don’t work out the way we want them to. It does us no good to remain in a relationship that is unhealthy and dead.

    16. Divorce doesn’t mean you’re a bad Christian or have failed.

    17. We will attract those who are on our level of emotional health. Keep in mind we attract certain folks for a reason. If you don’t like the people you end up with you need to work on YOU.

    18. We all have a role in the breakdown of any marriage.

    19. Infidelity hurts like hell but if you’re open to learning from it you’ll come out a stronger, wiser person.

    20. It’s easy to remain a victim but it takes strength to take responsibility for how your life will be. Don’t give that power to another person.

    21. Our spouses will fail us at some point but God is faithful always.”

    I urge you to read these words with an open mind, as they are straight from the mouth of someone who has lived through and survived the nightmare of infidelity.

    Click the banner below to find out more about this very helpful Infidelity Support Group:

    extra-marital affair healing tips

    Today Is The Day To Begin The Healing!

    Best regards,

    Laurence

  • Can A Cheating Spouse Really Change?

    16 ways to know if your cheating spouse is truly changing

    By Dr. Bob Huizenga
    Every marriage hits a snag, or worse, a major crisis (such as infidelity), that demands significant change if the marriage is to survive.

    So…there are promises to change and the two of you embark upon a new path. You watch carefully.

    “Can I trust this change? Is it permanent? temporary? How long will it last? Is my cheating spouse REALLY changing?”

    extramarital affair

    Confronting a cheating wife Is Painful – for sure!

     Good questions. Here are 16 ways to know if the change is going to last and your marriage will survive!


    1. You notice opposite behaviors and nonverbal communication. Passivity becomes activity. Recklessness transforms into thoughtfulness. Aloofness turns into engagement.

    2. You find yourself surprised. “Hmmmm, this hasn’t happened before, but is really nice! I wonder where this came from? But, I will take it!”

    3. He/she expresses more curiosity about you, about him/her self and others. He/she observes more closely what happens in your marriage, without criticism or defensiveness.

    4. You feel that somehow there has been a shifting of gears. There is a different rhythm or flow in the marriage. Much less effort. Much less tension.

    5. You find yourself noticing how differently he/she talks. The words seem different. The emotional tone of the words seem different.

    6. The negative times, where you felt very stuck, helpless and hopeless, are less intense, happen less often and you seem to have more effective ways to move out of those times more quickly.

    7. Your gut (intuition) tells you that this is ok. You begin to trust that part of you more implicitly. A part of you is clapping and cheering inside!

    8. He/she seems to have more direction and purpose. Less drifting. He/she seems to be driven more by internal desires and wishes rather than reacting to people or external circumstances. He/she takes up interesting hobbies or finds more enthusiasm for career.

    9. The changes seem to be more consistent and carry over for a longer period of time. More stability. Fewer swings. You seem more consistently on the right path.

    10. More concern is expressed for family, children and close friends.

    11. Words such as: “I promise. I’ll try. Or, I’m going to…” are NOT in his/her vocabulary.

    12. Moments of effusive crying, tear letting and chest beating are gone. Apologies are past and there is a sense of working right here right now to create what we want down the line.

    13. You hear no blaming of others. He/she does NOT make others responsible for his/her actions. You sense that he/she is intent upon responsibly creating his/her world.

    14. There is good eye contact.

    15. He/she is taking great steps toward self care both physically, emotionally and spiritually. He/she can state what he/she needs and negotiate with you to get those needs met. At the same time, your personal needs are considered.

    16. You worry much less about what will happen next.


    People can and do change. If you want your marriage to succeed, then you need to give it a chance. Here are a few suggested resources to get you going.
    Best Resources
    trusting the cheating spouse

    cheating spouse

    Break Free From the Affair
    Best selling ebook on infidelity. Learn how to diagnose an affair and plan a specific strategy that offers the best hope of influencing the direction of the affair. Click here for more information.
    Save a Marriage
    Save Your Marriage Ebook
    Learn how to control your feelings, calm yourself and move through a marriage crisis with confidence and effectiveness. This ebook works even. Click here for more information.
    Dr. Huizenga
    One on One Personal Coaching
    Yes, you can talk about it. Ask your burning questions. Accelerate your healing process. Find the best words and phrases to stop the marital crisis. Get the affirmation that empowers. Click here for more information.
    Join Our Communities
    Share:
    Feeling alone?
    This is a “closed” group which means administrative approval is required for new members to join (although I will not be selective in who I approve, everyone is welcome.)

    Only members will be able to see the following: the discussion board, the wall, photos and posted items. This ensures that all group members feel safe and can maintain as much privacy as possible.

    Don’t miss out on this opportunity to be part of a safe, supportive community of infidelity survivors!

    To request to join the group, go to https://lv130.isrefer.com/go/webinarfb/sideslip/ and click on “Join Group.”

    Charley says: Having this support group is wonderful. I got up this morning thinking, “Hey, at least there is this group of people who know what I’m going through. ”The thought kind of settled me down, and my day went well.
    Best regards,
    Laurence
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